Five years ago on Christmas, I was at a bowling alley in Karachi and saw a boy dressed like Santa Clause walking around, which I thought was weird. Then my friend turned to me, "Merry Christmas! It must be party time in the States, huh?"
“Umm…” I had to think for a second. Coming from the U.S., I was an automatic expert on American culture, but I had never actually celebrated Christmas in the States. No Muslim-American I knew celebrated Christmas—the ultimate Christian holiday. “It’s actually more of a family holiday,” I informed him.Sunday, December 27, 2009
Christmas in Karachi
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Back in Karachi
I’m back in Karachi. I’ve missed it a lot since I left in August. But this time I’m not seeking constant travel and adventure like before, I’m more curious about Karachi itself and what it’s like to live here.
It was hard to leave Pakistan this summer. Even when I got homesick, it was because I was in Lahore and missed Karachi (sorry Lahoris but Karachi rocks). I ended up extending my trip by months and weeks. I didn’t book my ticket till the day before I had to leave, or risk being disowned by my parents.
You would think my parents would love that I wanted to be in Pakistan. After all, they did try to move here when I was nine, in an attempt to save me and my siblings from becoming “typical American teenagers.” But we moved back to the U.S. because security was so bad (early 1990s political violence) and now Pakistan more or less freaks them out like it would any American parent.
My friend Zaineb from New York City was in a similar situation. When the banking industry nosedived, she randomly decided to spend the summer in Pakistan. She ended up loving it so much she had “World War III” with her parents to convince them to let her stay here for good. By the end of the summer, both our parents were calling us and telling us Pakistan was dangerous while we rolled our eyes and haggled for extra weeks and days.
But I’m back now and things are different this time—I’m used to the security situation, having a driver, and wearing kameez shalwar. I’m still a wide-eyed American as far as my family is concerned, but to me things feel more familiar than foreign. Now I’m just curious to see how this month turns out: was the Karachi I discovered just a summer illusion or a city to live, work, and love like any other city in the world, and just one great untold story?
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Pakistani Souvenirs: Where to Find Them
Pakistan is not exactly a tourist destination (thank you U.S. travel warnings since forever), so it’s tough to know where to go to find souvenirs and gifts. But with the art and political culture opening up, there is a lot of cool stuff around.
This is a list of shops and spots I discovered in Karachi. It should come in handy for those who end up there, including the flood of expats and their kids on ritual family visits during wedding season.
1. Daku (Bandit).
What: Politically-conscious t-shirts.
3. I ª KHI t-shirts. A rip-off of I ª NYC.
Where: Yellow and Deepak Parwani in Zamzama have some. Or become a fan on Facebook.What: Jewelry, souvenir trucks and rickshaws, home decoration.
Why: Run by a Lahore-based NGO.
What: Handicrafts.
What: Sunday market.
And to experience a bit of Karachi’s cosmopolitan culture while you are there, don’t forget to check out www.karachisnob.com.
Feel free to add tips or clarifications. I would love to hear about other finds so I can check them out next time I’m there.
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Dear Sir
Pakistan has become more progressive, with women much more visible in schools, workplaces, and on the street, but everyone who matters is still assumed to be a man. I was once in a position where I received many job applications from Pakistan. They were almost always addressed, “Dear Sir.” Even if we were hiring from Pakistan, which we weren't, I would never hire anyone who assumed I was a man.
So when Pakistan International Airlines (PIA) did it to me, I reacted.
Me:
Please cancel my 8:00 am flight on Saturday. I accidentally booked it thinking 8:00 was 20:00. (I forgot they use military time.)
Nadia
PIA:
Dear Sir,
This refers to your email. We will look into the matter and confirm the refund.
PIA Customer Service
Me:
Please note that I am Madam NOT Sir. Women book plane tickets too.
PIA:
Dear Ms. Nadia,
We apologize for the inconvenience caused to you by our email.
Regards,
PIA
It would not be hard to change their automated response to “Dear Sir/Madam.” Perhaps more women need to book plane tickets in Pakistan. Or just react more.
(Feel free to send a protest note to my penpal at PIA: khiwtpk@piac.aero.)
ISI at the Afghan Consulate
I ran into the ISI, Pakistan’s notorious intelligence services, while looking for an Afghan visa in Pakistan. Pakistan is not a police state, like Syria or Iran, so it’s not normal to run into an ISI agent.
The visa section of the Afghan consulate looked like a converted chowkidar’s (guard’s) hut, attached to the boundary wall of the consulate. It was on a dusty back lane in a residential area. And it wasn’t that easy to find, considering all the published addresses and phone numbers were wrong.
The first time I went to the consulate—dark and un-air conditioned—I watched a fatherly consular officer taking thumbprints and congratulating young Afghan men on their new Afghan passports. They looked like refugees working as laborers in Pakistan. I was a bit amazed. Afghanistan is often related to Pakistan, but these people spoke, acted, and looked completely different. The fact that I had never before noticed Afghans in Pakistan reminded me how invisible and impoverished Pakistan’s almost 2 million Afghan refugees are.
I looked a little out of place, with my wedge heels, big sunglasses, and U.S. passport. Most of all, I was a woman on my own.
The visa officer told me what I needed to apply for a visa and I returned on the second day to submit my application. When I walked outside, my driver was talking to someone, which was normal. But when I got in the car, he didn’t go away.
“Is she from Pakistan?” he asked my driver at his window. He looked like any man off the street, thin, dark, and wearing a dirty shalwar kameez. “Why does she want to go to Afghanistan?”
“Who is he?” I was asking my driver at the same time. “Why is he asking these questions? Why aren’t we leaving?”
My driver was giving us both vague answers, so I tried to get the man to talk to me directly. It took a few attempts. I guess he was trying to be respectful. Finally, he came around to my window.
“My friend wants to build a school in Afghanistan,” I explained, “I’m a student at Harvard.”
That probably made no sense to him, so he asked for all of my contact information. I wasn’t eager to give all that up to a dirty man on the street, but I took a bet that he didn’t have email or international calling and gave him my Harvard Kennedy School business card. He was instantly satisfied and we pulled away.
“Who was that??” I asked my driver in a dozen different ways. I didn’t get any clear answers, only that he had something to do with the consulate.
I went back the next day to pick up my visa. When I left, my driver was talking to the same man, but this time he was wearing nice pants and a clean shirt.
He greeted me like an old friend, apologizing profusely. “Your driver scolded me for scaring you yesterday. I should have showed you my badge.”
He pulled out an ISI identification card. On the back it said something like: This man has permission to enter and search anything he asks for. An unlimited warrant!
He then went on for a few minutes as I tried to get in the car, “The work you are doing is wonderful. You are studying very important things. More of our young people should be doing such things. We need more people like you.” He sounded like a proud relative.
Thank god I had my business card, I thought. One of his higher-ups must have recognized my school.
At first I thought the ISI officer was suspicious of me as an American going to Afghanistan. That would be difficult to get out of, if he thought I had other purposes and was making up our intention to build a school. But then I realized he was probably on the lookout for Pakistanis trying to go to Afghanistan. That made more sense, and I was even a bit impressed that the Pakistanis would put so much effort into monitoring the movement of their own (often problematic) nationals into Afghanistan.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Two Months in Pakistan
I finished my internship in Karachi, and got to know my city and my family along the way. Karachi has changed so much. It now has a raging party and restaurant culture, like any major city in the world. Young boys and girls hang out, smoke, and party together. I never thought I would see Pakistan so cosmopolitan and liberal. (Pizza Hut was the most exciting thing to do in Karachi when I lived there in the early 90s.)
My journalist friend even wrote about me on Huffington Post and the Dawn Newspaper blog.
I came to Lahore for a meeting and ended up staying here for three weeks. The NGO I was working for just started their English summer camp, and once I saw the kids, I cancelled my plans to vacation in India. I signed up to teach in Minhala, a border village that was part of India until the 1965 war with Pakistan. The girls tell me they can see the lights of India from their rooftops.
The village, Minhala, is an hour and fifteen minutes from Lahore, through cattle, farmers, donkey carts, dung, and dust. And it’s sweltering hot, with the electricity hardly ever working, but I still look forward to school each day and am sad that tomorrow is the last day.
I am starting to miss home: my jeans, my independence, my sense of absolute security. For the past two months, I have constantly been balancing a dupatta (long scarf) on my shoulder, worrying that my driver and servants hate me, and developing escape strategies for every possible kidnapping/robbery/shooting (but not bombing) scenario in my head. But despite those mental adjustments, fed by my own American consciousness and very paranoid family, I have loved it here and I will miss it, a lot.
I am ready to book a return ticket. But first, I will take a break at a resort in the mountains in northern Pakistan, say goodbye to my family in Karachi, spend a few days in Kabul, and then fly home to Alabama with a stop in DC. Sweet home Alabama, seriously.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Peshawar PC Bombing
I got an email last night from a friend in Washington: Are you ok?
I thought he was just checking in since I hadn’t responded to his last email. Then I saw another similar email and a few texts.
The Pearl Continental (PC) Hotel in Peshawar had just been bombed. I had reservations there 3 weeks ago when a friend and I visited Peshawar, en route Afghanistan. The Red Cross runs a courtesy flight between Peshawar and Kabul, which our host NGO in Afghanistan arranged for us to take.
But we were nervous about Peshawar so our plan had been to camp out at the hotel, which is very close to the airport. An American friend confirmed the plan was fine. It is totally secure, he assured me, so secure that the U.S. Embassy is planning to buy it.
My uncle in Pakistan, who facilitates everything I do while warning that it’s a bad idea, discouraged staying at the PC. There is a rumor that the Americans want to use it as a base, he said, and hotels are obvious targets.
I trusted the Americans’ security assessment over my uncle’s paranoia, and made reservations. But we cancelled them once we landed, worried we would get bored at the hotel.
Still, we convinced the family friends hosting us to take us there. I had been told that eating a sandwich at PC cafe was the most exciting thing to do in Peshawar. But when a car bomb went off at a cinema that evening, we cancelled our tour.
If word gets around that the Peshawar PC was being used as a political and intelligence hub for the U.S., there are people in Pakistan who will feel it was a legitimate target. Yes, this is the messy web that constitutes the Pakistani Taliban, but it is also the numerous Pakistanis who do not trust American intentions here.
But the hotel was also being used as a base for UN and international aid organizations for IDPs in the region. The injury of two UN aid workers in the attack means that desperately needed humanitarian efforts are likely to be curtailed. If this happens, then the long-term secondary effects of this attack may be broader than the original blast.
Monday, June 8, 2009
Police Encounter
Late on Friday night, my friends and I were headed to the Sindh Club, but we took a wrong turn, hitting a dead end. As we turned around in the dark lane, a policeman suddenly came into view, blocking our car, with a huge gun strapped across his chest. My friend, surprised, swerved a bit before stopping.
I had an immediate flash back. When I was in fifth grade, my family lived in Karachi. A policeman stopped my mom, saying that she tried to hit him. He asked for money and she had to give it to him. If she didn’t, he would take her license to the police station, where they would demand an even bigger bribe.
But that was during the day, at a major intersection. It was now very late at night, in an isolated area, my Pakistani-British friend didn’t speak Urdu, and did I mention we had two American white guys in our back seat?
A policeman questioned my friend roughly: “Where are you going? Why are you here? Why didn’t you stop? Show me your license. Open the trunk. Get out of the car.”
I immediately started making phone calls for back-up, but couldn't explain where we were. I knew the cops just wanted money, but with edgy officers in a dark lane, anything could happen. I didn’t know exactly what, but this is Karachi, and they didn’t need a reason.
The officers were looking into the car. “These are my friends,” I tried to explain in Urdu, because western faces are very unusual in Pakistan. One of them calls himself Plato (to disguise his real name) in Pakistan. They are both interning in Karachi for the summer.
The officers ignored me. “Get out of the car,” they said to the Plato and his friend.
They were searching the guys, asking for IDs, pulling out wallets. My American instincts were to get out of the car and yell at them, but my Pakistani sensibilities told me to stay quiet. As a woman, it would be inappropriate for the officers to even talk to me, and it was best not invite interaction.
Then my friend came back to the car, and the police let Plato and his friend back in too. Suddenly they became friendly, offering directions to the Sheraton. It was over. They were letting us go.
I yelled at them in Urdu, fully within my privileges as an irate, educated woman. “Why were you trying to scare us like that?? These guys are visiting Pakistan, and they are our guests.”
“There are bomb blasts happening in this country, don’t you know? Bomb blasts,” a senior officer said in the we’re-just-doing-our-jobs tone.
I almost thought there was a fraction of sincerity in what he said. But as we pulled away, Plato informed us, “They pulled a 1000 rupee note out of my wallet.”
When I told my family the next day what had happened, they confirmed that things could have gotten much worse. It’s normal for police to stop people for bribes, but in our circumstances, there are many other ways that they could have made money off us. The stories they told me are too scary, twisted, and obscene to repeat.
The incident left me with a lasting sense of insecurity. It is so easy to get comfortable and have a good time in Karachi. It’s not until a guy shows up with a gun and you feel a loss of control that you realize how quickly things can change.
The next night, I was eager to get home early. I had tried to defy the culture and stay out late at night, but I realized how much safer and more comfortable I felt at home. I suddenly understood why women in Pakistan tend to stay at home, or other private spaces, and always escorted. It is not so much because of cultural or religious conservatism, which is what I always assumed, but because of the lack of security and protection, and the culture of exploitation, on the streets outside.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
A Visit to Swat and Buner IDP Camps
When disaster hits a country like Pakistan, where nobody trusts the government, private relief becomes the way to get things done. This happened during the 2005 Kashmir earthquake, when the roads going up north were clogged with volunteers and relief supplies, and it is happening again with the ongoing IDP crisis.
This weekend, I visited IDP camps in Swabi, about twenty miles from Swat and Buner. I was with a group of businessmen-philanthropists who had filled a truck full of food, medicine, toys, and sewing machines in Karachi, and sent it on the three-day journey ahead of us.
We were consistently impressed by the UN camps we saw—even more so because they were run by the Government of Pakistan.
The first, called “Chota Lahore,” meaning "Little Lahore," was bustling with market activity. Small, makeshift shops lined the dirt path leading to the camp. People were also lined up to get their national ID cards (in order to receive aid) and medical care. A huge UN World Food Programme tent anchored the camp.
Next, we visited a beautiful government school housing IDPs. We had to confirm several times that it was a government school—the spacious, green campus looked like it should belong to the military or a private institution. One room, covered in colorful bolts of cloth, hummed as about eight women stitched away furiously on sewing machines. And kids were taking lessons in at least two classrooms, while another room was being used as a clinic.
We finally drove deeper—into a sea of white tents in an open field. The sight was incredible, but what we saw next was truly shocking. A black chord was strung across the front of each tent, seeming to connect them in their long rows. Electricity.
We could see large electric fans whirring inside, critical in the intense heat. We were told that officials allowed "loadshedding" (Pakistan's daily electricity outages) in the nearby town, but not in the camp. Even Islamabad doesn't get electricity 24 hours a day.
Clean water was also being delivered to the front of each tent. We passed a two story building under construction, all gray cement, and were told that it had been raised in the past five days. A soccer field was also being developed.
This was all Government of Pakistan. A sign read: Electrified by the Peshawar Development Authority. The man managing the camp was part of the Government of the Frontier, and the business-philanthropists, normally government skeptics, could not stop raving about his sincerity and commitment. (As a woman, I was somehow tricked into waiting in the car so did not meet him.)
Things were not perfect of course, detailed here. The heat, in the open field, meant that many people were getting sick. And only a fraction of the IDPs are in camps. Much more destitute tents were pitched on the side of the highway, and there are certainly much more isolated, scattered IDP populations.
But the camps taught me two things. First, they demonstrate what the Government of Pakistan can do, given the right combination of political will and international pressure. International pressure is powerful currency in Pakistan, but it takes much more than that to overcome to hurdles of capacity, bureaucracy, and perceptions of national interest. To get action to back up words, our demands must make as much sense in Islamabad and Multan as they do in Washington and Cleveland.
Secondly, I learned that governments are not enough. Even at the height of its effectiveness, it was clear that civil society in Pakistan has a critical role to play in filling obvious, and less obvious, gaps. Private citizens, not the government or UN, were providing sewing machines to the IDPs, generating income and clothing for a population that has nothing but what they were wearing the day the bombing started. Similarly, I saw many children excited and jostling for juice boxes, being handed out daily, like cones from an ice cream truck. This was also privately arranged, along with a monitoring and enforcement mechanism to prevent juice box littering.
And it may only be local hospitality that has made this crisis barely manageable.
But the real fears are for the future of the camps. I worry that as international attention drifts, they will become neglected, like the Bajaur camps I saw in Peshawar, or informally settled, like Afghan slums in Kabul and Karachi. There are also serious questions about the rebuilding of Swat and the tribal areas, completely destroyed through war, and the return and rehabilitation of refugees.
Regional stability and international security are tied to these questions. Harnessing Pakistani civil society, through public-private partnerships domestically and internationally, will multiply our capacity to grapple with the challenge.
Monday, June 1, 2009
Fashion as a Social Indicator: Capris and Burkas
I came to Pakistan quite confident in my kameez shalwar from five years ago. But as I got ready for work on my first day, my cousin assured me, “Don’t worry, everyone will know you are from America.”
Men in Pakistan can wear Western clothes but, for women, kameez shalwar are a staple, if not a must. It consists of a long shirt (kameez), baggy pants (shalwar, think Jasmine’s harem pants) and a long scarf worn across the shoulders (dupatta). The three-piece outfits were always a package deal, meticulously coordinated.
Now, however, the kameez shalwar is beginning to look like western clothing. Tops are stitched to look like dresses, shalwars have been replaced with “trousers,” and dupattas are being discarded. And tops and bottoms are now sold separately, mix and match, just like jeans and t-shirts.
Hemlines are also being raised, as they were throughout the 20th century in the United States. Women are now wearing “capris,” and compensating for it with long, loose shirts. Capris are a critical victory. I fought my own battle at home a few years ago. But now they have been incorporated into the traditional dress in a conservative Muslim country.
But like everything in Pakistan, the world of fashion is stratified. There must be at least as many burkas in Karachi as capris, although the two worlds rarely meet.
When I lived in Karachi, in the early 1990s, none of my many aunts covered. Now, they all wear burkas when they leave the house. Burkas have become a common sight on the streets of Karachi, among women who must walk or use public transportation, especially in the poorer neighborhoods of town where the upper classes would never venture.
I assumed that burkas reflect increased religiosity. For my aunts and many middle class women, it might. But it has also become a new standard of conservatism—fashion with a function, to avoid harassment and the prying eyes of men. Harassment has always been a problem in Pakistan. And in a society with no social protections, burkas offer a way for women to be completely hidden, while completely exposed.
Both capris and burkas make a strong statement, in defiance of one another. And inherent in the skin they expose, or their folds, is class, education, international exposure, discrimination, and gender-based violence, as well as religious ideology. Whether these two worlds come closer together, or continue to define themselves in opposition to one another, reflects the struggle for the future of Pakistan.
Friday, May 29, 2009
In Search of Defense
Yesterday’s attacks in Peshawar (now seven blasts in Pakistan since I got here last Monday) and the Taliban-issued warnings brought a moment of tension in my family. So far, the conflict hasn’t reached Karachi, but they fear it is getting closer.
The Taliban’s warning is to civilians: leave the northern cities (Islamabad, Lahore) as we escalate attacks on government and security facilities based there. Undoubtedly, those who can leave will trickle out—those with foreign passports, visas, education, and means. The exodus has been going on for years, but war threatens to be the final drain on Pakistan’s human and financial capital.
My uncle cautiously asked me last night to return with him to New Jersey. Over the past few years, my relatives who always lived in Pakistan have been setting up a second residence there.
I was torn. I have loved every moment of my past two weeks in Pakistan and the only question in my mind has been if I should come back to the States at all when the summer is over. The idea of things getting so bad here that I have to leave is depressing. I want to stay.
And I am not the only one. So I will do what the rest do: move to Defense. Defense Housing Authority, like most secure areas of town, is a residential district developed by the military. It is where most of Karachi’s elite and western classes live and play. In Defense, people throw lavish parties and spend thousands on dinner, while on the other side of town women wear burkas in the streets, beggars plague cars for 10 rupees (less than a dime), and mobs burn cars.
But it is not all hedonism—it reflects a Western standard of living, and it is as much a part of Pakistan as the mullahs and the madrassas. It is also how life goes on in a city otherwise full of violence, poverty, and lawlessness. And as much as the IDP camps and slums, it is a side of Karachi that I want to explore.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
A Day in the Life of Pakistan: Beyond Lahore Blasts
My aunt predicts that the next bombing will be in Karachi or Islamabad, since the last two have been in Lahore (today) and Peshawar (Saturday).
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Pakistan vs. Afghanistan: Developed, Safe, and Liberal
Slums AKA IDP Camps of Kabul
The woman tried to show us around. She pointed to one house, a girl was visible through the doorway, sitting with her head down on her knees, holding herself tightly and rocking. "Sick, sick," the woman said. When the girl looked up, we noticed tears in her eyes. She put her headdown again, in apparent agony. The woman said they did not have money to send her to hospital. Next door, the girl's newborn baby was sleeping. The girl was too sick to feed the baby.
Monday, May 25, 2009
The Forgotten Children of War
Building a Model School in Afghanistan
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Peshawar: Taliban, IDPs, and Car Bombs
IDP camps were probably not on the list of safe things to do, but Khalid was eager to please. He arranged private security and got us access to a UN camp on the outskirts of the city for refugees from Bajaur, one of the Federally Administered Tribal Areas (FATA), which was reduced to rubble by the Pakistani Army in its 2008-2009 operations against the Taliban.
The camp looked like destroyed mud ruins. Like many IDP camps, it was originally developed for Afghan refugees, then destroyed when they chose or were forced to leave. Deeper in, simple white UNHCR (UN High Commissioner for Refugees) tents were set up. The people told us that they had been in the camp for 8 months, displaced before the current Swat crisis which has captured international attention. They had been living in primitive conditions-- no electricity, little or no running water, suffocating heat, inadequate provisions, and the kids could not go to school because they had to help with survival. For example, they only way to create fire to cook food was to burn trash. So we met several kids carrying bags of empty juice boxes and other trash that they had spent all day collecting. At least one of those boys had dropped out of school to collect trash.
The women and children seemed happy to have visitors, but the men were frustrated and skeptical. They had been forced to leave as the Pakistani Army began bombing and bulldozing their homes to root out the Taliban. One man told us that soldiers looted their homes before bulldozing them, and they left with nothing but the clothes on their backs. Like everyone else, he was angry and confused. Nobody knew the Taliban or where they were, only that their lives had been destroyed by the Pakistani military. Now, they had been forgotten in camps, victims of an older crisis, while Swat IDPs nearby were receiving an outpouring of attention and aid.
As it started to get dark, our escorts rushed us out of the camp. We were told there had been a huge car bombing in the city. It was the third that week. As soon as we got home, I turned on the TV and searched for the news, but as soon as I found it, the electricity went out, which happens several times a day in Pakistan.
That night, I could not stop thinking about the people I had met in the camps and the Taliban and criminals that haunted the city outside. Our host, on the way home from the airport that morning, had told us about how scary conditions had become in the city. Bombings, kidnappings, and Taliban harassment and violence, especially towards girls, had become common. It felt like Afghanistan before the Taliban took over. Everyone who could leave Peshawar had left. They had already sent their kids abroad and, despite being well established in the city, were only waiting for their foreign visas to leave. They would abandon their property and businesses, and leave with little. There were no buyers these days, only sellers. But they had no choice.
I could not help but ask our driver, himself once displaced, the simple question: why are these bombings happening in Peshawar? Does anyone claim responsibility or explain? Yes, he said, sometimes the Taliban does, but really, people here are just fed up with their lives. The economy is so bad, people have nothing. They can barely survive. There is so much misery. Of course people like that find an outlet for their anger in violence, and become susceptible to groups like the Taliban that seem to give them some purpose or meaning in life.
Peshawar was chilling, but I only caught a glimpse. I plan to return to spend more time in the IDP camps. The camps are dangerous-- not as much for me, as for the future of Pakistan and regional and international security. After all, the Taliban came out of madrassas in Afghan refugee camps in Pakistan. And I want to have a better sense of how aid commitments and announcements coming out of Washington are on the ground.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Introduction
I have many stories and reflections to share, but since it's late, I will start with the one that is most fresh in my mind and save the rest for later.